No internet connection
  1. Home
  2. Blog Comments

Comments for If Programming Languages Were Harry Potter Characters - The Slightly Disgruntled Scientist

By System @system
    2014-06-15 09:57:47.000Z
    • 94 comments

    There are 94 replies. Estimated reading time: 27 minutes

    1. L
      Laurie Anne Ormond
        2014-07-07 09:55:47.000Z

        If the wizards are programming languages, would the house elves (who can be ordered around by just about anybody) be markup languages?

        1. DDelphi Psmith
            2014-08-20 02:32:39.000Z

            Or subroutines, since you call them whenever you want them. Or maybe the objects in object oriented programming. And hey, is it just a coincidence that Object Oriented Programming = OOP = Order Of the Phoenix lol?!

            1. Ppote
                2015-03-05 18:50:40.000Z

                Sysadmins, they keep everything working and people treat them like shit.

              • X
                In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                xr09
                  2014-08-13 13:34:47.000Z

                  >> Well gee everyone just loves this language! Except the jerks who don’t

                  Lovely :D

                  1. D
                    In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                    Delphi Psmith
                      2014-08-20 02:30:14.000Z

                      What about COBOL? That's clearly Nicholas Flamel -- should have been
                      dead a long time ago but the Sorceror's Stone of bank reports keep it
                      alive :D

                      1. JJason Heeris
                          2014-08-21 23:02:51.000Z

                          Perfect :D (So does that make maintenance programmers the equivalent of the elixir of life?)

                          1. DDelphi Psmith
                              2014-08-21 23:51:08.000Z

                              Why yes, I guess it does :)

                          2. S
                            In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                            Sellyme
                              2014-09-14 09:01:10.000Z

                              This is disturbingly accurate.

                              1. W
                                In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                WyattEpp
                                  2014-10-17 16:28:37.000Z

                                  And I guess that makes D... Kingsley Shacklebolt.
                                  (This is pretty good!)

                                  1. Qqznc
                                      2015-03-05 19:15:19.000Z

                                      The weird thing is that D has Voldemort Types. http://www.drdobbs.com/cpp/...

                                    • S2
                                      In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                      Sameer Ajmani
                                        2015-01-15 04:06:43.000Z

                                        As a Harry Potter fan and a member of the Go programming language team at Google, I'd like to hear which character fits Go...

                                        Perhaps Flitwick? Small and charming :-)

                                        1. D2dtoebe
                                            2015-03-05 16:08:12.000Z

                                            I was surprised at rust being there but no Go.... While they are very different with different-ish targets they are of the same time... and usually the same circles

                                            1. In reply toSameer Ajmani:
                                              AAlex Espinoza
                                                2015-03-05 16:43:24.000Z

                                                I think Go should be Harry Potter. I do not believe Python will kill C, but Go might.

                                                1. KKadaverstern
                                                    2015-03-05 19:12:25.000Z

                                                    Go can't kill C/C++/Rust with a Garbage Collector demanded. You can't develop games or bare-metal software with a language like Go. GC is not usable for this.
                                                    Go is not a system programming language and never will be with a GC.

                                                    1. JJason Heeris
                                                        2015-03-05 20:10:34.000Z

                                                        Yeah, I was tossing up between Go and Rust, but ultimately, Go has no ability to displace C in the embedded space as far as I can see, and that is really what drives new usage of C (IMO). Any "C killer" needs to be able to be used for embedded work.

                                                        1. S2Sameer Ajmani
                                                            2015-03-08 05:36:52.000Z

                                                            My other thought was Dobby: small, powerful, and surprisingly well-liked by Python users (once they get to know it). Java users find it odd and improper, and C/C++ users dismiss it outright. And yet more and more people come to like it once they give it a chance...

                                                            And the Go Gopher bears a striking resemblance to the big-eyed house elf.

                                                        2. In reply toAlex Espinoza:
                                                          JJason Heeris
                                                            2015-03-05 20:33:38.000Z

                                                            Actually I claim Rust will ;)

                                                        3. A2
                                                          In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                                          Andy
                                                            2015-01-16 04:34:10.000Z

                                                            The C one is not exactly accurate. Instead of, "Scattered around the world there are… things. Little, unregarded things… that keep C from dying out altogether. Embedded devices, household appliances, single purpose systems and various other unseen, disregarded objects carry C’s compiled code within them," it should probably just say, "Very nearly every computer I've ever used either directly or indirectly carries C's compiled code within them."

                                                            1. JJason Heeris
                                                                2015-01-16 11:03:33.000Z

                                                                FWIW, I like C — the language, specifically, maybe not so much the ecosystem.

                                                                But consider what it means for a language to be alive, or really more to the point: dead; and what characterises its personality (things which, for now, are only tenuous metaphors anyway). There's plenty of Cobol out there, there's probably even the occasional new project in it, but in terms of language livelihood, it's right down one end of the scale. "Very nearly every" financial transaction I conduct probably involves it, but the programmers who find opportunity in it are the equivalent of necromancers.

                                                                It's not just the number of projects, or the proliferation of the devices they run on, but things like... are new students being taught it, or will they learn computer science and engineering paradigms through the lens of Java, or Python, or Haskell? Out of the volume of projects started this year, which languages will feature the most? When new ideas are expressed in academia, what language are they expressed in?

                                                                While there is no end of people who will declare C to be a Dead Language, sure, it's still alive. But it's no longer alive in the ways that many other languages are. Those "very nearly every" computers are, by themselves, completely taken for granted and pretty much invisible. No-one would care about them if it weren't for Languages That Aren't C.

                                                                If you offered someone a modern smartphone or desktop machine with everything that isn't C removed, most people would politely decline a very useless device. Therefore I don't regard these things as "keeping C from dying out altogether." But there are devices out there that are made more useful solely by C (eg. the World's Greatest Toaster, probably). They are the "little, unregarded things," to which I refer.

                                                              • M
                                                                In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                                                Matt Powell
                                                                  2015-03-05 10:30:31.000Z

                                                                  RUBY

                                                                  Full of flashy tricks and clever syntax, Ruby is nonetheless not the most effective language choice for any given programming task: a fact you'll forget after an hour of using it because a) it's just so very pretty, and b) it's cast a memory charm on you. Kept around mostly to stop Rails programmers from doing something really dangerous.

                                                                  Ruby is Gilderoy Lockhart.

                                                                  1. S3Sweeney Nightingale
                                                                      2015-03-05 15:19:40.000Z

                                                                      It's useful enough that I keep going back to it...

                                                                      1. MMatt Powell
                                                                          2015-03-05 18:35:53.000Z

                                                                          Full disclosure: I use Ruby daily.

                                                                          1. JJason Heeris
                                                                              2015-03-05 20:23:54.000Z

                                                                              How do you think I feel. C is, like, 99% of my job.

                                                                        • D3
                                                                          In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                                                          Dan Williamson
                                                                            2015-03-05 15:10:50.000Z

                                                                            Oh man, I don't want to program in Umbridge anymore :(

                                                                            click to show
                                                                            1. M2
                                                                              In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                                                              Mickey_disqus
                                                                                2015-03-05 15:17:04.000Z

                                                                                "Little, unregarded things… that keep C from dying out altogether."

                                                                                click to show
                                                                                1. S4
                                                                                  In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                                                                  sixFingers
                                                                                    2015-03-05 15:28:14.000Z

                                                                                    Yes, C is dead, apart from the fact that 99% of languages listed here are written in it :)

                                                                                    1. J2jcdyer3
                                                                                        2015-03-05 19:50:54.000Z

                                                                                        Rust was written in OCaml, and is now self-hosting.
                                                                                        FORTRAN was written in assembly language.
                                                                                        Python has implementations written in python and java (and maybe C#? What's IronPython written in anyway?).
                                                                                        Haskell was written in LazyML and is now self hosting.

                                                                                        That's 3 and a bit out of 14. I don't know about all the rest. So it's closer to 80%. C's important, but let's not exaggerate things.

                                                                                      • J3
                                                                                        In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                                                                        Jon
                                                                                          2015-03-05 15:28:50.000Z

                                                                                          I feel like Dumbledore should be LISP!

                                                                                          1. JJason Heeris
                                                                                              2015-03-05 20:30:34.000Z

                                                                                              I actually almost went down this road, but my partner suggested that LISP is more like Tom Riddle's diary. Think about it: it actually started life as an ink-and-paper implementation, until eventually it was given "life" when Steve Russell implemented eval.

                                                                                              1. RRooster61
                                                                                                  2015-03-05 20:45:18.000Z

                                                                                                  A case could be made for
                                                                                                  Lisp being Ollivander. He's not the main player, but being THE wand
                                                                                                  maker to get your wand from, he's shaped the magic coming from every
                                                                                                  wizard or witch for a half century.

                                                                                              2. R
                                                                                                In reply toUnknown [DwE4KFYW2]:
                                                                                                Rooster61
                                                                                                  2015-03-05 16:09:49.000Z

                                                                                                  COBOL

                                                                                                  click to show